There Abouts

If history books are to be believed, then we of the 19th-century are responsible for the creation of “work ethic.”  Whether or not we embody this ideal likely depends on the ghost, the bit of the century to which he belong, or the bit of class from which she hails.

In my case, the praise/censure is fully earned.

In life, I worked two jobs in order to obtain middle-class status and support my brilliant wife, Marion, who married down for love, the darling.  One of these jobs was at the opera–I know, I know, not terribly middle-class of me–and the other was at a set of offices devoted to the production of a weekly news bulletin and a monthly literary magazine.  I started on the press in 1832 and worked my way up to cravats and co-ownership over the years, eventually acting as editor, as well.  During the whole of this period I retired at midnight and arose at 4 am.

After “the paper,” I did the same.

And even now in death, I wake up at bloody 4 o’ clock in the morning.

It is the habit that quite literally will not die.

Had I my druthers, I would laze in bed until at least 10 am, wrapped around my dozing husband–an ancient Roman named Marcus who obliges me with broad shoulders and very little snoring.  But I simply cannot stay abed, and so there I am, wee hours of the morning, looking for quiet things to take up my time.

Some of this time goes to things tangential to my employment within Ghost World.  I am a model at Afterlife Magazine and Modeling Agency (AMMA), and I write the occasional piece for our magazine on things to do with travel, fashion, and philanthropy.  Most of my philanthropic reflections, though, come out of my own magazine, which accompanies the quarterly reports for the Junius-Smith Home for Children, a home and charity I started for ghostly orphans of war.  I also do a bit of design work here and there, although my husband is the mastermind behind our JS Designs line most directly. And I do a great deal of carpentry, woodwork, and mechanical engineering, because, truly, the lost young man who found his way to London and worked his way up through trade by sheer force of will never goes away, no matter how fine the waistcoat within which you encase him.

I also adore helping my family with their endeavours, and my husband and children have plans with which they will need assistance in the coming years…but, to be a good father and partner, one also needs a room of one’s own, right?  Some private occupation.

This website, then, is my room.

I realised about two years ago that I would eventually run out of private home projects.  One can only build so many chairs and staircases before one turns into the Winchester Widow…

So, I preemptively petitioned the Ghost World government for permission to engage in communique with you–with alivelies–because lord do I miss regular writing and editing.

Ghost bureaucracy moves even more slowly than that of alivelies–ghosts seem to think they have all the time in the world–and I spent the last two years waiting and occasionally responding to summons or signing paperwork as a specially appointed committee composed a set of careful protocols which I must follow as I write.

Although I am free to answer as many questions as I consider worth answering on things Victorian, my range on things ghostly are to be just a slight bit curtailed.

For instance, although the committee agrees that my unique position as a ghost with a host (I say, children’s book in the making there) allows me bridge the gap between life after death, they are concerned with my either revealing too many mysteries, or causing more curious hangers on than we need.

On the latter point: this website will not only reveal the posh happiness of energetic post-life existence, but also, on occasion, the ambiguities and sadnesses of such–this is not a world to which you should like to come too soon.  That said…

On the former point: this website will also provide a set of tableaux that engage with pieces of life as a ghost, rather than a systematic construction of Ghost World from the ground up, and I do tend to favour the lighthearted.  What you will find here will be, in the main, reflections on energy construction, co-habitation with alivelies along with the more intentional haunting scene, the idiosyncracies of a world plagued by severe generational splits, Deathtime Television, ghost marketing, energetic travel, adoption, pets, and all sorts of other random bits and bobs that make up life as a well-articulated ghost.

I’ve set a few self-strictures, as well.  Please note that I am not interested in engaging with conversations on religion and its bearing on the afterlife.  I am also not interested in acting as a medium, so please do not ask me to contact a friend or family member that has passed on.  We don’t have a phone book, anyway.  And finally, although I do find ghost shows delightfully melodramatic, please don’t expect any kind of concerted effort to address such things as ectoplasm or whatnot.  Really.  Ectoplasm.  How distasteful.

So that about settles it.  Here’s a website about ghosts, by ghosts (in the plural, as my husband will from time to time likely guest or shout something from the wings), to be published on the bi-weekly, with the occasional bits and bobs between the major posts.

Very much hope you are quite diverted.

Yours, etc. – Elliot Junius-Smith


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